Teenage Romance…

Teenage romance is a knavish emotion that marks the ripe stages of puberty. The common misconception is that it’s love. For the majority of situations, no; it is a lovey-dovey intimacy between two people who usually think their significant other is “hot”. True love is completely different. It’s not when the significant other is just “hot”, but beautiful. The catch with teenage romance is since it’s so sudden, it’s mistaken for love.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with teenage romance. It’s perfectly normal. In fact, it’s a good thing. It shows that there’s no total rejection in a person’s heart. When faced with these feelings, always accept them. Doubt makes the emotions painful. It can eat the inner fibers of a human if not handled appropriately. The best step to follow is to have an initiative, complaining never leads anywhere. It doesn’t matter if the person in mind is in a different “league”. If the connection seems strong enough, asked him or her out.

The main fear is rejection. Think about it. Who wants to deal with it? However, if looked at intimately, what’s the worst that can happen beside the person saying a flat no? He or she won’t slap you, or start to convulse at the thought of your question. So what if the person is the most social butterfly on the planet? Or maybe he or she’s dated dozens of other people. What difference does it make? It’s impossible to predict what will happen, so just go with gut instincts, because it usually invokes the right answer.

Of course, there should be some thinking behind the process. Not to the point of overloading, but to the point where there’s a sense of what should be done. There’s no point of going for gut instincts if there’s no maturity behind the instincts. Some basic tips should be laid out. Don’t just tell the person “I like you”, and expect him or her to instantly fall head over heels. If anything, pop the question: “Want to go out?” Not necessarily like that, but eventually, you should get to the question.

There is one word you should watch out for: the F-word… friend. That’s a polite way of saying no. For example, “I only see our relationship as friends.” This doesn’t mean the person utterly despised the idea of a relationship. Maybe he or she isn’t ready for anything serious at the moment. If he or she says she’s flattered, you’ve impacted the person in a significant manner. That is to say, there was a mark of pure interest left in the individual, which means something was said correctly.

The one way to make everything is laid out correctly is to be honest. Don’t over-think at all. That leads to over-complicating the matter, which is a definite no-no. Speak from the heart, not the mind, when it comes to these situations. If the person completely rejects you, it was never worth it. As much as it might hurt to hear that, he or she just wasn’t worthy of what was being offered… period.

Looking back, it may seem as if the advice is for people in love. Technically, learning how to deal with teenage romance leads to maturity in romance. So, in a sense, both yes and no. Nonetheless, learning the basics for romance, simple or complicated, helps for future situations where the first decision is a mystery. To end on a positive note… good luck to you.

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Love and Relationships

You would think I’m the last guy to ask about topics these sensitive, probably because I’m not exactly a romantic kind of guy. Arranged marriages do that to you. Yet, it’s because of my lack of anything that I could offer a few tips and words of advice on how to deal with an emotion as powerful as love. Hope that makes sense.

First off, you should know what love is. It’s not the feeling you get when you see a person that’s “hot”. Love should be completely different. Cliche, yes; True, also yes. It should be much more than a “Cupid’s arrow” type of punch. Love has the power to eat you up from the inside out if you can’t control it. So when you see what could be your lover, it should be different from any feeling you’ve ever had. There’s a reason as to why the emotion seems so different: Love obviously doesn’t come with a snap. Being in love is more than just thinking your counterpart is “hot”. It’s that he or she is, quite honestly, particularly beautiful or handsome. Basically, it takes quite a long amount of time. With the situation I happen to be in, I know that if I’m going to fall in love with a girl, it really should be something special.

Romantic relationships can be  the most difficult task to deal with for any teenager. It’s about respect. As a note for guys, don’t go around treating women like toys to add to your possession. I’m not saying you necessarily do, but that’s one of the biggest mistakes teenage guys make. You feel on top of the world when you can even become friends with an attractive girl sometimes. However, guys take it too far on occasion, because what they have now is “bragging rights”: I know a hot girl or girls now. That gives me permission to rub it in your face. Other teenage men who aren’t exactly as lucky take it as an insult. Plus, it’s not as if the girl you’re playing around with approves of everything you’re doing. You really haven’t hit it big until you have a really stable relationship. Period.

For girls, don’t use guys to work for you and just leave them after they’ve fulfilled your task. It’s not as if they don’t realize what you’re doing. Again, it’s not like I’m pointing out anyone specifically. You don’t even know whether they might think you’re pretty. So when you use any guy to copy his homework, or to get him to help you with a project, or anything, think about what happens afterwords. Either you could get to know the guy and realize he’s especially nice or friendly, or you could leave him and poke a large hole in his self-confidence. Think about it.

In the end, love is both a physical and, more importantly, an emotional connection. You can’t assume when it comes to love. You need to be 100% sure. It’s OK to have a relationship and not necessarily be in love. The catch is, don’t say you’re in love just to get someone for yourself. Let time take its course. Trust me, there is somebody out there who loves you already for who you are, no matter who you may be.

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